Become the Memelord, Kazuya
by QueenOfEllipses
Summary: A memer, a furry, a pimp, and a bunch of other crazy pals try to get rid of the demons in Tokyo to prevent God and his army of social justice warriors from enslaving mankind. Basically a crackfic. Lots of OOC-ness, I guess.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: tfw it was three am when u uploaded this and didnt bother to look back over it til nine pm the next day cuz nothing seemed wrong with it when u first uploaded it it wasnt me it was the ipad i typed this on**

***cough* Yeah, anyway. Here's a shitty story full of OOC-ness and fun wooooo. I'm making this up as I go along so don't expect all the details and stuff to be correct. I just made this for the shits and giggles.**

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><p>I've been staying at my cousin's place for the past few days. After a little quarrel with my parents, I felt that I should go and stay with the one person who understands me the most: Naoya. I currently have a break from school, so that's convenient. I come here a lot, so I don't think my parents care at this point.<p>

I loved my cousin so much because he doesn't make fun of me for who I am, unlike my parents.

They're always saying that being on my computer all the time is a "terrible thing" and I'm becoming exactly like "that pitiful NEET cousin" of mine. It's true that we both spend a lot of our time on the computer, but that's because the internet is an amazing place that can separate you from the painful reality that is the real world. Just ask Atsuro. The internet introduced me to my true love... memes.

Now, it's not like my friends really bash on me for being an extreme memer, but some of them, Yuzu especially, is always ranting about how unhealthy it is to laze around in a dark room and staring at a computer screen for hours on end. At least Naoya and Atsuro understand me. And Naoya even enjoys looking at MLP memes with me! It's not like I look at memes all the time. I have a Facebook. And I have a bunch of games. I recently bought Meme Run on the Wii U.

Anyway, after Naoya moved out, I spent much of my free time on 4chan, Cheezburger, and occasionally Tumblr. I used to be like Yuzu and enjoyed going out every weekend to spend my hard-earned cash on who knows what, but I eventually realized that the internet was the best thing ever invented, in addition to memes. Who needs outside when you can stay inside and look at funny cat pictures all day?

I woke up today in a surprisingly good mood, despite my ass hurting like crazy from last night's activities. I got out of bed and tried to locate my clothes. My shirt was on one side of the room and my underwear on the other. Thankfully, my headphones were placed neatly on the nightstand (I'd rather they not get stepped on anytime soon). I walked with a strange limp and collected my various pieces of clothing. Naoya gets a little too frisky at night. It was not necessary to throw my clothes every which way and be so rough with my delicate self. I'll teach him a lesson later. "That feel when you have to tell your own cousin to be more gentle with your fragile body when you're doing the do," I muttered to myself.

I didn't bother straightening myself out, because I really need a warm shower after I get some breakfast. I walked into the kitchen and noticed Naoya sitting at the table with a fedora on his head as he stared avidly at his laptop. He must me watching the new Equestria Girls movie. Unlike Naoya, I'm not really much of a brony, or a furry in general, although I can greatly appreciate some of the fanart. He always gets so engrossed in watching those fictional ponies prance around the screen, so I doubt anything I said right now would really register to him.

However stupid he may look right now, Naoya isn't just some hikikomori who sits around and faps to colorful ponies all day. While, yes, he may eat junk food all the time and is not very fond of vegetables, he is pretty useful. Believe it or not, he's amazing at programming. He's made several programs and websites before, and is even paid good money to do some of that stuff, which is how he bought me these expensive headphones, alongside a new laptop to replace that shitty old one I once had. He usually let's Atsuro help him out a bit because he's basically Naoya's apprentice, but he and I both know that Naoya can do all that stuff himself. Heck, he even did most of the coding for Fur Affinity! The owner, despite paying Naoya for his work and everything, did the finishing touches and took all the credit for himself and his partner.

I grabbed the most sugary box of cereal in this apartment and a bowl. I grabbed the carton of milk out of the fridge and poured a lot in the bowl. "Kinda wished I had some hot choclety milk," I sighed. Putting chocolate milk into the unhealthiest cereal known to man is godly. Naoya finally noticed I was in the room after I sat down at the table.

"Kazu," he said in his alluring, deep voice. He pushed his chair away from the table, stood up and walked towards me, kneeling down beside me and placing his hands on my shoulder.

"Naoya, as much as I like you, please don't talk about the movie. I'd rather not hear that."

He shook his head. "No, I'll dicuss that with Amane later. Listen," he stared firmly into my eyes, "you need to become the overlord."

What.

He saw the confusion in my eyes and explained further. "My love of My Little Pony spurred me to dabble in magic, as you may know. Of course, I'm a creep, so obviously I started becoming more interested in the dark arts. Look over there," he said pointing at the sofa. I can't believe I never noticed the purple clad man sitting there until now. He had ladder-shades, several tattoos on his neck, and an abundance of bling. "Sup," he said.

"See that? That's a demon. You can tell by that ridiculous outfit. I ended up summoning him last night after you fell asleep. That pimpin' mess of violet is Loki, and he's told me that, starting tomorrow, God's going to lock down Tokyo, as part of his ordeal for humans or something. Loki said you need to become the overlord of the demons in order to stop the lockdown and fight God."

What?

"I'm not exactly sure you're quite sane right now, but even if all that's true, why do I have to be an overlord?" I asked.

"Swag," Loki said for some reason.

"Yeah," Naoya nodded. "The demons are just a bunch of pimps and swagfags. Apparently, they can only be controlled by a memer, and you're the biggest memer I know."

True. I one first prize at the Memer Convention held in Shibuya last year.

"Fine. But how do I know that's not just one of your brony friends and you're just trying to troll me?"

Naoya's unnaturally red eyes glared at me. "Have you ever seen a brony dressed like that before?"

"Touché."

"Exactly. Plus, he was kinda in his demon form when he appeared, so he could probably transform again to convince you, if that's necessary," Naoya said, with a slight tinge of pink on his face.

You fucking furry. You have me, you ungrateful little...! And to think, I even put up with ponies.

"Yeah, that was fun. Turns out your cousin's either into handsome demons, like myself, or just spandex," Loki said.

Naoya coughed and looked at the door, an even brighter shade of pink. "So, do you believe us or not?" he said in a calm manner.

I shook my head, deciding to let my fury die down for the time being. "No, I believe you." Naoya's stupid blush has got me convinced, and besides, Naoya's definitely the most trustworthy person I know. "So, what's the point in me becoming overlord in the first place?"

"Yo, I can tells ya that," said the pimp as he stood up and came over towards the two of us. "This organization, the Shomonkai, have developed a sorta server dealy that let's 'em summon demons through them, uh, COMP things you humans got. I heard that they defeated the demon and guardian Jikoku six months ago, allowing the metaphorical wall between the demon world and Earth to become weaker, allowing the summoning of demons to be much easier. God and his SJW's just up and decided to give humanity an ordeal 'cuz o' that, because apparently humans summonin' demons is a big deal. The ordeal, the locking down of Tokyo, starts tomorrow and ends in a week. If the demons aren't all gone, this place if going kaput. Your government's controlled by them angels, so they got the powers to kill everyone in the lockdown."

I nodded slowly and ate my cereal while he talked.

"Even though this really has nothing to do with him, God wants us to repent for summoning the demons. Allegedly, by driving the demons out of Earth, the lockdown will be lifted and everyone will be happy. So, to get all the demons out, we need to get an overlord to rule over the demons and command them to go back to the demon realm," Naoya said, basically cutting Loki off. Said pimp seemed a bit irritated now.

"I coulda said that myself you little brat. I was on a role," he said, pouting and throwing a dirty glance in the direction of my cousin.

Naoya simply chuckled and said, "Whoops."

Loki sighed and flopped down in the chair beside me. "Yeeeanyway, it's so unfair that your God is chillin' up and heaven, plannin' on givin' humanity a task of gettin' the demons off o' Earth in a week. And if you guys don't, he's basically gonna strip man of his freewill. I'm sure you guys don't really want that, which is why I'm helping."

Naoya put on an intimidating expression, stood, and crossed his arms. "Okay. Now what's your game, Demon?"

Loki threw his hands up. "YOLO, man. I just thought this'd be fun, y'know? The swaggy demons overthrowin' God. Plus, an old... acquaintance of mine, you could say, requested that I do this for him, as he's kinda unable to make any moves right now."

After swallowing my last bite of cereal, I stared up at him in shock. "What do you mean, overthrow God?! I thought you just said we'd just get rid of the demons?!"

I glanced at me with an almost equally surprised look. "Eh? Did I say that? ...Well, I ain't gonna lie, but with the power of all the Bels and demons, you probably could kill God if you wanted to"

"Bells?" Naoya and I said in unison, looking up at the demon. Loki giggled.

"Ohoh, did I forget to mention? The Bels. They's these really strong demons fightin' for the throne of Bel, which is really what you're aimin' for. Beat 'em, become overlord, or the King of Bel, and you can do whatever you want with your demons."

This is a huge amount of junk to take in , but I guess I understand. Survive the lockdown, become the King of Bel, and tell all the demons to go home. Seems easy enough. And here I was hoping to stay at my cousin's place and relax for at least another two weeks until my break. The Tumblr users would be so jealous to find out this it is I who truly has the throne in hell reserved for me.

...Wait a second...

"Hey!" I suddenly shouted. "How the hell am I supposed to fight the Bels anyway?! Punch them or something?"

Naoya looked as if he remembered something. "Oh, yeah, that. Actually, I heard Shomonkai were basically giving away these demon-summoning COMPs, so I went and got a few last night," he said, going over to get a bag lying by the front door. He pulled out the contents of the bag and placed them on the table one by one. In the end, there were twelve COMPs and a package of My Little Pony stickers.

"They gave you all of those?" I ask, not even bothering paying attention to those stickers, because I know he went and bought those to decorate the COMP he'll get.

"Well, perhaps I may have just asked Amane for them..." he said rubbing the back of his neck as he looked at the table. Oh yeah, I forgot that Amane was basically the "Maiden" of the Shomonkai. Her dad's the Founder, after all.

We first met her when Naoya dragged me down to a brony convention in Roppongi. He was amazed my her wonderful human!Twilight Sparkle costume and felt the need to talk to her in person. We were surprised to find out that such a down-to-earth girl was part of the Shomonkai, and the Founder's daughter, no less. I wonder if Amane knows much about the demon thing that's happening...? "She said it'd be best to turn these on in an empty place outside," Naoya went on.

"Yeah, a demon'll pop out once you turn those things on," Loki said with a dull look on his face.

"And how do we fight THOSE demons, hmm?"

"I also have an answer to that one," Naoya inputted. "In the simplest of terms, these COMPs are built in with something called a Harmonizer, which grants anything and anyone in it's range the ability to fight demons."

I really wish I knew how the Shomonkai did all of this. Or how any of this is even possible. I never really believed in Gods or demons, but I suppose I do now. Damn, this is all way to sudden. Demons and Gods and COMPs and the Shomonkai and Overlords and...

"Ugghh, enough of all this, it's not even noon yet!" I whined as I leaned back in my chair. "I feel all sticky from last night and I just wanna take a shower. Nothing's even happened yet and I'm already stressed..."

Naoya smirked, bent over, wrapped his arms around me, and whispered into my ear with a suggestive tone, "You know, I know of another way you could relieve your stress. Tomorrow's gonna be busy, you know. Think you could hold off on your bubble bath for now...?"

I felt all the blood rush up to my face. "Hell no! My ass still hurts from yesterday! And can you stand to be a little more gentle with me?! I'm as delicate as a flower! Besides, how can we even do anything with that guy here?" We're not gonna screw if there's another guy here. This is the smallest apartment ever, and the walls aren't exactly soundproof. I would feel terribly uncomfortable. That aside, I'm really pissed at him finding that demon attractive. I'm going to let him suffer until next week.

Loki looked offended. "Now now, what's wrong with my presence? Ya know, I wouldn't mind joining in on-"

Naoya cut him of with a deadly leer. "No way in hell." He and I both knew that he'd be so into getting it on with a demon.

My cousin suddenly groaned, pulling another pack of stickers from his pocket. "Here," he said, before he grabbed his laptop and headed towards his room, his fedora nearly falling off his head.

Raeg face stickers... he... he really does care... I don't know why I doubted him...

The smiled on my face quickly went away once I noticed Loki staring at me with an unreadable expression.

"W-what?"

"I take it that you don't remember either? Though I can't see why you would..."

Huh?

"Remember what?"

He sighed and laughed at the same time. "Ohh, never mind me. You and your cousin better go have fun and fuck before stuff gets crazy tomorrow. I'll go take a walk. Maybe I'll find some cute hunnies! Ciao for now!" he said with a wink as he stood and walked out of the apartment.

My face became even redder.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: lol**

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><p>Due to the fact that Naoya was taking a nap, I could only assume he didn't get any sleep after he had summoned that demon last night. Shockingly, he's not the type to pull all nighters, albeit, he can run on just an hour of sleep. I deduced that he wouldn't wake up until at least twelve, so I decided to go ahead and take a shower, despite his lewd suggestions from earlier. That Loki guy left anyway, so it wasn't like there was really anything else I could do. I would have rather taken a shower and get rid of that icky feeling before I settled down on my bed and enjoyed the sweet company of my precious laptop.<p>

After stripping and stopping into the small shower, I noticed many bruises in various locations all over my body.

"I'm such a masochist," I sighed, but it really didn't bother me. The whole S&M thing can really spice up your sex life. At least, mine, anyway. I didn't mind all the hickeys, but shit, my ass felt horrible this morning. Not gonna lie, it is pretty fun lecturing Naoya about being more gentle with me. Every time he tells me to shut up, I tell him, "For eight thousand dollars a month, I will stop." In actuality, I doubted he was bothered by my teasing. He craved me more than Alpine Ibexes craved minerals. I'm not talking about all this just as an excuse to say more memes, if that's what you're thinking. Lel.

That shower was very relaxing, and I felt far more refreshed than I had when I had woken up. I could not, however, forget what Naoya and Loki were talking about during breakfast. Everything they said seemed legit, which is the reason why I was so nervous. Becoming the King of Bel sounded cool and all, but how would normal people react to that? A beautiful, memeing teenage boy gaining the power to control demons at will? That would go over quite well with everyone. I'm sure they could find a bigger memer, anyways. I heard something from that math freak at the Memer Convention last year. He said if "those stupid zeros" and "the zetta dumb composer" had come along, they would have won. I had no clue as to what that meant, but hey, better them than me. What do I know about being an overlord, much less the memelord of demons? Why can't Naoya do this and just become the 'furry lord' or something? He was the one who caused that Loki to show up in the first place due to his newly found interest in the dark arts. He'd be ecstatic to have all of that power. Or, speaking of that brunette pimp, why couldn't Loki be overlord? I mean, now that I think about it, couldn't anyone be the overlord if they had the power? I don't think being a memer or a pimp mattered when you are level 99 with high resistance to everything and everyone else is only level 50. Loki seemed to know more of what's going on than I.

I walked out of the bathroom with dripping wet hair and a towel wrapped around my waist. It had been over twelve hours since I touched any of my electronics, so I needed internet, and I needed it right then. Oh, and some clothes, too.

I walked towards my room and flicked the light-switch on, only to discover that my cousin was now lying awake on my bed, tapping away at his laptop. He peered at me from behind the computer and the red frames of his glasses, meeting my slightly startled gaze.

"Ne... need something?" I warily inquired. He was silent and continued to stare at me. What the hell?

I tiptoed towards the direction of my phone, never breaking eye contact. I looked away for a brief second to pick up my precious device only to turn around to find my cousin standing right in front of me, still staring directly into my eyes.

"Wha-whup-what-ye-YESSSS?" I screeched. He was being creepier than usually, and that was highly impressive.

He roughly grabbed my wrist, causing me to drop my phone. Thank the gods I decided to get that durable case instead of that super cute plastic one. (You can either get personality of durability, never both.) Naoya firmly pressed his lips against mine, causing me to gasp, allowing him to slip his tongue into my mouth. I whimpered, as I eventually stopped trying to push him away and started to clutch his shirt. I'll just take another shower later. It was when he pushed me down onto my bed when I heard a sleepy voice coming from the hall.

"Kazuuuu~? Did you take my laptop?"

The source of the voice poked his head around the doorframe and took in the scene before him.

"NAOYA?!"

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!"

We both yelled at the same time, eyes turning to the guy in front of me, who was currently laughing. In a brief flash of light, the look-a-like that was standing there just a second ago was replaced with Loki.

"Y-you should have-! Ahahah- oh my go- I didn't think you would- ah well, I am quite alluring, even when I'm disguised as someone else! I was half surprised when you stopped trying to push me away! O-oh, you two should see the looks on your faces!" The demon laughed, pointing at us.

I quickly scrambled off the bed and ran behind the real Naoya, who had a mix of shock and anger displayed on his face.

"How the hell was I supposed to know you were Loki, you damn troll?! You, you didn't say anything, and, I mean, you suddenly kissed me, and I just assumed Naoya- you- were just in the mood to have sex, and-" Naoya cut me off there, turning around to look at my face.

"You let him kiss you?!" he yelled, a blush sprawled out across his angry face.

"Like- like I said! I thought it was you! Loki left before I went to shower, and he said he was gonna go pick up some hunnies, so I thought that was just you being all creepy and horny!" I tried to explain, with an equally red face and flustered expression.

Loki continued to laugh, causing us to turn to him with deadly glares. If looks could kill, that demon would be a pile of ashes right about now.

"Now now, I wasn't planning on doing anything~! Honest! I just wanted to have a little fun is all! You were so cute, I couldn't help myself! Ahahah!" The demon was either that oblivious or he was just ignoring the lethal aura that was emanating from my cousin and I? I couldn't tell.

"Fun?" I asked, "I thought you were gonna go find some 'fun' elsewhere with a bunch of girls of something?!"

He waved a hand. "Nah, honestly, I wasn't in the mood, so I just came back inside after wandering around the building for a few minutes. I heard the shower running, so I took Naoya's laptop while he was sleeping and decided to have some fun another way~!" he explained, grinning. There seemed to be something else hiding behind that smile, but I couldn't figure out what it was.

Naoya clicked his tongue, threw me over his shoulder and walked us back to his room, leaving Loki to stare back at us in genuine surprise.

"Wha- hey, wait, I was just-!" Naoya slammed the door before I could hear the rest of the pimp's protests. He set me down on the bed before he started to rummage through his bookshelves.

"Um, Naoya, whatcha-?"

"I'm sending him straight back to hell."

"Wha... seriously?" I was pretty peeved at the demon's actions, too, but, with the upcoming events, I say we should at least keep him around until I get the power to send him and all the other demons away. That makes me wonder... are there already other demons here, or does that all start tomorrow?

"Eeyup... Ah, found it." He pulled a rather thick leather-bound off of the top shelf. He came to sit beside me. He opened it up to the table of contents, skimmed through it, and flipped to a page titled, "How to Send Your Pesky Demon Back to Where He Belongs!"

"Uhhh... hey, maybe-"

"You cannot change my mind, Kazuya," Naoya cut me off in a curt manner.

I puffed out my cheeks, snatched the book out of his hand, and climbed onto his lap. He seemed to have suddenly remembered I was only wearing a towel as blood started to trickle out his nose when I childishly said, "Oh, come onnnnnn~!"

He looked away as a bright pink began to appear on his face and took the book back. He simply replied with, "Isn't that enough lewdness for one day?"

I had an irritated expression on my face as I rubbed the back of my neck saying, "Well, damn, that stuff usually works."

"Not today," he said with a smirk.

I sighed. "Look, believe it or not, I kinda think we need that troll. He knows more than we do about what's gonna happen, so, don't you think it'd be good to have him around?"

Suddenly, he retorted with a loud, "You cannot trust that guy!"

My eyes widened in shock. Loki's actions couldn't have made him that angry, could they? In mythology, Loki is known to be somewhat of a trickster, but he always cleans up after his messes. Him pulling pranks shouldn't actually be much of a surprise, and Naoya should know that. My cousin looked at me with an equally shaken look and looked down at the book as he muttered, "Why did I..."

I stood and walked over to a small crate in the corner of the room. I removed the lid, pulled something out, and strutted back to where my cousin sat.

"Dahling!" I spoke, imitating the haughty accent of the white unicorn plushy I held in my hands. Naoya got this one, Rarity, alongside some other pony plushies at Build-A-Bear Workshop. "You're just so tense. Let's go in there and chat over a cup of tea! You shouldn't let that immature joker push your buttons, dahling. You and I both know it would be highly advantageous to have him with us tomorrow, so I suggest that we keep him around at least until the end of the week. Sound good?" 'Rarity' said, 'kissing' Naoya on the forehead. He took her out of my hands and hugged her. He looked back up at me, shutting the book.

"Fine, until this whole ordeal is over. After that little stunt he pulled, I started getting this... strange feeling. I don't want him with us any longer than necessary."

I smirked. "You sure that was just jealousy? Don't worry, we can-"

Naoya shook his head, absolutely serious. "No, not that. Something about him is rubbing me the wrong way. I don't like it, but I agree. It would be in our best interest if he was with us during the upcoming events."

My cocky smile did not falter. "Mmhmm~ Well, now that that's settled, wanna have that tea party?"

Naoya stared at my chest. "Sure, after you put some clothes on. At the very least, you're not allowed to have more than eighty percent of your skin showing while in the presence of that bastard."

"Hm, fine."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: kek. I have no idea what I'm doing anymore, tbh.**

After slipping on my favorite pair of red skinny jeans and a gray long sleeved shirt, because, you know, even though it's summer in Japan and it's damn hot today, you're cousin was serious about the whole 80% thing, and... where was I? Oh. After tidying myself up, Naoya and I finally went out to confront that shitty demon.

We walked into the kitchen only to find him slumped in a chair, texting someone on his phone.

He glanced up and jumped in over exaggerated shock.

"Whoa, you two are way scary!" The laugh that followed that statement was obviously fake. I crossed my arms.

"Listen, shit head, mind telling us why you pulled that stunt?" I inquired, impatiently tapping my foot on the kitchen tile as I leered at that lavender fashion disaster.

He looked up at the ceiling, as if he really were giving deep though to my question. As if.

A comical grin stretched across his face as he closed his eyes and spoke. "Would you believe me if I said I wanted to get the romance part of the story over and done with quickly?" he asked, the grin starting to look more like an obnoxious smirk. This quickly earned him a kick to the face, proudly delivered by my companion. He whined, falling to the floor, saying he was dying. His irritating charade earned him another blow to the face, that time presented by me.

"Now," it was Naoya's turn to give the demon a menacing glower, "perhaps you can come up with a better excuse. Or, better yet, tell the truth before I bestow upon you another swift kick to the face. Which would you prefer?" He smiled, the hostility simply oozing from his very being, even making me feel a bit uncomfortable.

Loki's demeanor briskly changed from silly coward to high school bully. He stood and walked right in front of Naoya, trying to be intimidating as he loomed over him. I hadn't noticed until then that he was actually quite tall. "Oh, yeah? And what's a weak little human gonna do to me?" He looked abundantly cocky as he taunted my cousin. Naoya snapped. In the blink of an eye, Loki was doubled over in pain on the floor, courtesy of a swift knee to the crotch.

Regardless of the pain, he still managed a smirk, followed by a groan and a, "Well, at least... we got that part of the story... over with..." He then went limp. Had I not been so sympathetic, I would have kicked him again for his ongoing demolition of the fourth wall. This is going to be a long week.

I looked up at my cousin. He looked at me. And I looked at him. And he looked at me. And I looked at him. And he looked at me...

He blinked. "Wanna go shopping?" he asked. I nodded. With that, he stepped over the lifeless corpse, and went into his room.

I crouched down next to the demon, poked him, then decided, yes, he was most likely faking, and will probably be up by the time we leave. Naoya was already back by the time I stood up. I noticed he had his My Little Pony shoulder bag, which seemed to be filled to the brim with something. I looked him in the eye. "I thought we should pass these out to our friends," he explained, pulling out a COMP as I wondered how he was just so damn intuitive.

"Is that a good idea?" I asked. "Giving everyone the power to summon demons sounds a bit... unsafe. What if they get hurt? Then what? Or what if they don't believe us at all?" I wouldn't believe it either if I weren't the main character of this- dammit.

Naoya looked thoughtful, before he gave a simple shrug and said, "Dunno." I stared at him. Sometimes he was so cool, and other times he was plain dumb. I sighed, running my hand through my hair.

Loki, face still on the floor, stirred, lifted his right arm and pointed his index finger upward. I could almost see the lightbulb flicker on above his head. "Mwaybeh I cwould cwonvwince dem." I grabbed Naoya's hand before he could move forward to step on the demon's head. It seemed he was still angry. This is going to be a _long_ week.

Naoya pulled away from my grasp, obviously irked. "Kazu, do you honestly think that would work?"

I could almost see the options appear above his head.

_-Of course not._

_-I think it would._

_-I love you._

_-...What do you think?_

"...What do you think?" The ambiguous answer is always the best choice. Naoya sighed.

"The ambiguous answer is not always the best choice, Kazu. Think of it this way: if you weren't the protagonist, knew nothing of what was going on in the world, and your close friend suddenly walked up to you and summoned a _demon_ out of a Nintendo 3DS, how would you react?"

...Oh, I get it now. I shifted under his gaze, slightly embarrassed at how I couldn't come to such an easy solution. "I would... totally lose my shit."

He nodded. "Exactly. This idiot's idea sucks, end of that. It would be best to just try to reason with everyone, wouldn't you agree? Besides, even if they don't believe us, they will if they just turn on the COMPs."

That made sense. I wonder...

"Hey, when will we turn our COMPs on? Y'know, to see if they actually worked?" I pondered.

He grinned. "It doesn't matter when, but it would be best if it were in an isolated location."

Loki poked his head up. "Or~! You could do it now and freak everyone out! That'd be fun!" He giggled. Naoya was already out for the kill. I stepped out of the room because, frankly, their 'Tom & Jerry' antics are super funny, but that's a bit too much for just under two hours.

I stepped into my room and shut the door, sighing as I tried to ignore the thumping and shouting. Before we leave, I should probably call Atsuro...

I slipped my phone out of my pocket and tapped the first contact on my list. It rang only once before he picked up.

"Oh hey, Kazu, what's up? Dude, it's been forever since we last talked. What's going on? What's shaking, man? Dude, you'll never guess what happened on the newest episode of Tokyo Ghoul. See, it turns out-!"

"Eheheh, um, yeah, hey, no spoilers please, I haven't watched it yet." More like, I haven't even started on the second season yet. The dress and the llamas and all kind of got me sidetracked... Ahh, memes...~

"Oh, shoot, well, that sucks. Shit goes down, dude. You should totally watch it whenever you get the chance. Anyway, why'd you call me? Something up?" Atsuro sounds so peppy right now, gosh I love him. No homo, bro. No bromo.

"Uh, yeah, 'bout that, you think you could meet Naoya and me at, hmm, say, three o'clock, in front of the 901 building? We need to give you something."

I could imagine his eyes sparkling at this point. "Ooh, what is it?" He was obviously intrigued. I have no idea how I should put this...

"Um, it's a... surprise?" Smooth.

Atsuro laughed. "Hah, exciting. Well, whatever it is, can't wait to see it. This is great timing, actually. I ran into some problems with my coding on that site I'm making."

"Oh, the social site for otakus?"

He was flustered. "Wha- hey, it's not just for 'otakus'! It's for anyone who simply enjoys anime and gaming and want's to talk about their passions with other people!"

I chuckled. "Same thing, isn't it?"

Atsuro was most definitely pouting right now. "Dammit, you've been spending too much time with Yoohoo." I full on laughed at that.

"Ahahah, jeez, sorry~! So, see you at three!" I hung up. It was right then that I noticed I hadn't heard anything from the kitchen for the past few minutes.

I probably shouldn't have left those two alone.

I quickly ran back out of my room. It was quiet, too quiet. I stepped into the eerie kitchen, only to find both the demon pimp and my cousin out cold n the floor. I flailed.

"Whap-wha-what the hell happened here?!" I screamed.

The figures turned their heads up at me in unison. I was terrified.

One of them crawled towards me and gripped my legs. I was fucking petrified.

The figure, turning out to be Naoya, glared up at me with a crazed look on his face as he spoke. "Dammit, Kazuya, are you positive we shouldn't send this ass hat right back to hell? It'd be easy. If I summoned him, I can just as easily send him back to where he came..."

I waved my arms and looked down at him. If he could smell fear, then he would notice that I reeked of it. "N-Naoya, I left for five minutes, at most! What the hell did you two do?!" I screeched.

He slowly rose to his feet, using me as an anchor. "Doesn't matter," he spoke in a quiet voice. "Let's go. I don't want this fucker coming with us." I have no idea what happened, but it's obvious I'll have to keep these two in check during the upcoming week. Naoya currently sounds like a tsundere, honestly. I need to make sure there isn't another romance chapter. Not again. Really, one would naturally assume the two of them had known each other for a long time.

Despite him looking like a crazy wreck, he grabbed his bag, we stepped over Loki, and we left. Right as I stepped out of the door, I bumped into someone.

"Ah, I'm sorry," they said. It was a young man, probably a little older than me, holding a few bags of groceries. He gave me a gentle smile, before a quizzical look grew onto his face. "...Hm? Oh, hey, you're Kazuya-san, right? Naoya-san's little cousin?"

Who is... Oh, yeah, this is...Taketora, isn't it? He lives right next door to Naoya. Even though Naoya's lived here for a while, he only just recently started to actually talk to his neighbors, now that I think about it.

I really wonder what brought upon that change of heart.

I grinned. "Ah, yes! That's me! Good morning, Taketora-san!" I noticed my cousin was now behind me. Normal people would think he's creepy. Thankfully, Taketora knows him well enough to not be surprised by his creepiness.

"Heh, mornin'!" He laughed. "Oh, good morning to you too, Naoya-san." He seemed to have ignored Naoya's ruffled appearance.

He tilted his head upward and replied with a simple, "Yo."

Taketora gave a small wave. "Well, you two look like you're busy, please excuse me! I was just planning to go bake some cupcakes, actually," he lifted the bags slightly, "so I'll bring some over later!" With a smile on his face, he turned and entered his own apartment. Naoya's eyes were ablaze. Cupcakes were his favorite desert.

As we walked out of the building, I told him we were to meet Atsuro in Shibuya at three. I didn't get a response, so I turned to see him staring up at the window of Taketora's place.

"Hey, Naoya." I stopped, causing him to run into me.

"Hmm, what?" Was the curt reply I got.

I placed my hands on my hips. "What's up?" He looked back up at the apartment building.

"I just sure hope I get some cupcakes..." he uttered under his breath, barely audible.

I tilted my head in curiosity. "The hell is that supposed to mean?"

He waved his hands in front of him in innocence. "Oh, nothing. Just me and my disturbed thoughts. You know how it is." Oh, that explains it. I shrugged, and we continued on our way.

We walked in silence. Naoya repeatedly opened his bag, took out a COMP, examined it, and put it back. It wasn't hard to tell that he was pretty eager to turn one on, judging by how pink his face was. We were almost at the 901 when we ran into Yuzu. Well, she ran into us. She was the first to notice us, scurrying up from behind and hugging me.

"Iyaaaa~! Hey, Kazuuuuuu~! I can't believe I ran into you! You barely go out at ALL. We really haven't talked much this summer, have we? Oh, it's just great to see you actually outside and not looking at memes on your phone! Oh, err, hello to you too, Naoya-san." Yuzu and I are really close childhood friends, if I hadn't mentioned that earlier. She doesn't exactly like Naoya, and I don't know why.

For some reason, Naoya looked almost happy to see her. As she continued to hug me, he quickly and uncharacteristically said, in a delighted tone, "Ah, Yuzu, great timing! You're going to see Atsuro, correct?" He pulled two COMPs out of his purse- I mean, bag. A pink one and a blue one. "Here, take these with you. You're going to need them, so don't let get of them!" He handed them to her with an unsettling grin on is face. Yuzu released me from her grasp and begrudgingly accepted the COMPs. She ignored Naoya and turned to face me.

"Hey, Kazu, what are these for?" she questioned, gesturing to the game systems she had just been given. Naoya was now glaring at her. Before I could even get my thoughts straight, my cousin had already grabbed my hand and began dragging me away.

"Ohohoh, they're just little gifts from us to you! Tell Atsuro something's come up, and we can't make it, would you? Have fun, and be cautious when turning those on!" He laughed as he continued pulling me along, his eyes shut as irritation spread across his face. Yuzu was confused, frozen in place as she simply watched us leave. I waved at her and gave her a weak smile as I yelled and told her I'd meet up with her and Atsuro later, she really should be careful, and that she and Atsuro might wanna be together when they turn the COMPs on.

I looked up at Naoya, whose grip loosened once we got some distance away. "Hey, the heck was that about? Where are we going?" He pouted.

"Nowhere in particular. I simply don't like her jumping all over you like that."

Seriously?

I jerked away. "Stop being so obsessive over me. I feel bad for not telling her more about what'll happen..." I really hope she doesn't get hurt.

That bastard that is my cousin smirked. It seemed like he had read my mind when he said, "Oh, she's pretty strong, no? She and Atsuro will me fine. More importantly..." a mischievous glint appeared in his eyes as he pulled a purple COMP covered in My Little Pony stickers out of his bag, "it's time to summon a fucking demon."

He's acting like he hadn't already summoned one.

Outside of the Electric Museum was surprisingly empty, so he simply sat down right where he was standing. He opened it up, only to find it was encrypted.

"Hmm? How are you gonna get past that?" I asked aloud.

He scoffed. "Don't underestimate me, Kazuya. I'm at the top of the, what do you call it, 1337 ladder. My haxor skillz are unbeatable." He cracked his knuckles and pulled his laptop out of his haori. I knew better than to question when and how he got that in there.

He plugged it up to the COMP and began typing furiously. In less than two minutes, the whole encryption had been annihilated. He sighed and fell to the side, obviously disappointed in how easy it was for him to get through that. What a drama queen.

"Too predictable. It's almost like I programmed that myself," he muttered. He lethargically pressed a button and rebooted the system. When the screen came back on, it showed several applications. I couldn't get a good look at it before the screen flashed and went dark, grabbing Naoya's attention as he briskly sat up.

"Decryption confirmed," it stated. "Booting program." A long list of letters and numbers zoomed upwards as the screen continued to flash.

"...Condition green."

"DEMON SUMMONING PROGRAM ready to boot."

"Booting DEMON SUMMONING PROGRAM." The screen went black.

Another paragraph of text ran by before it said, "Peaceful days died. Let's survive."

The screen flickered once more. Before I knew it, there was a monster in front of the two of us. A demon. It had large, black and purple wings, greenish skin, and wore a tight, matching violet suit. It also had long, blonde hair, that, to be honest, didn't exactly look very stylish. It really clashed. Regardless, the demon looked fucking powerful.

Eventually, it spoke.

"Surprise, bitches. I bet you thought you thought you'd seen the last of me."


End file.
